Conversations with Monica Kneusel

Today we’d like to introduce you to Monica Kneusel.

Hi Monica, thanks for sharing your story with us. To start, maybe you can tell our readers some of your backstory.
On Christmas Day, 2021, I sat down in an armchair at my parent’s house, and carefully scrutinized the photos that my mother had taken of me with her new camera that day. She had encouraged me to stand outside in the sunny Colorado winter, and raved about the blue sky against my hair and eyes, and how it matched the earrings she lent me for our “photoshoot”. I couldn’t see what she saw. When I looked at the photos, I counted the flaws: the bump on one side of my nose, how frizzy my hair was, that one eye that was ever-so-slightly smaller than the other. After looking at the photos for several minutes, I decided that I wanted to create a better self-image. I didn’t know what that would look like, but I did know that my weapon of choice in this battle for higher self-esteem was social media. I opened Instagram, and tapped the “create a new account” button. On Christmas Day 2021, I took my first steps towards modeling, and changing the way I saw myself forever.

At first, my main support was my mom. We planned “shoots”, and outfits, and locations, and we worked together to create images that we both loved. Throughout the first few months, my inner monologue continued – echoing “not enough” at me in every photo. Fast-forward to 2022, and I had built relationships with a few incredible photographers in the Colorado modeling space. I was getting consistent work, and my inner voice was ever so slowly changing from “not enough” to “maybe I can do this”.

Now, in 2024, I have been able to be part of a beautiful community of models, creatives, and photographers, and I have found a deep fulfillment through my modeling work. Nothing about me changed, but the way I view and approach myself has gotten softer and more lovely. I will forever be grateful to myself and the incredible talents I have met for creating a space for me to see the beauty in myself and who have given me the space for self-expression.

Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
At first, there were constant struggles. Perfectionism reared its ugly head more often then not, and it took me a while to learn that the lens through which I saw myself, was not the one through which others saw me. Some of my least favorite pictures of myself have gotten the most positive reactions, and it really prompted me to have a more generous view of what was beautiful about myself.

Modeling spaces can be rigid, especially when it comes to size, shape, and skin color. At a size 6, I was once described as “plus size” on a call sheet, and it has been more than once that a photographer or designer has brought me clothing to wear that doesn’t fit, citing that “this is the largest we make”. Pushing against the stereotypical image of a “model” is something I have had the privilege to do, and will continue to advocate for. Everyone deserves the chance to feel beautiful regardless of their body type or size.

Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
My modeling work is one of the areas of my life that brings me the most joy and fulfillment, partially because of the images I am able to create in partnership with some amazing photographers, but also because of the way it has deepened my community and exposed me to different places and points of view. It can be uncomfortable to place yourself in the “spotlight” so to speak, and to accept the judgement that comes along with it, but throughout my modeling journey I learned to lead with my values, and cultivate resilience. As with any creative venture, modeling comes with a lot of rejection, often for traits you can’t change about yourself. It forces you to create a strong mental understanding of who you are and what is valuable about you that, paradoxically, doesn’t include how you look.

Before we go, is there anything else you can share with us?
I would love to encourage anyone reading this to jump into action when it comes to their dreams and goals. I waited so long to start my modeling journey, and it has truly enhanced my life. You can do anything you set your mind to!

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rivera_rojas_modeling?igsh=ODN0Ym9uNjEyeGdy&utm_source=qr

Image Credits
In Bloom Photographie (@inbloomphotographie) Rosie Compton (@rosiexcompton) Ola Elkhazindar (@olaelkhazindar) Rosie Compton (@rosiexcompton) Rosie Compton (@rosiexcompton) Milagros Malave (@mmalavephotography)