Today we’d like to introduce you to Kathryn Lucatelli.
Kathryn, can you briefly walk us through your story – how you started and how you got to where you are today.
I have been doing inner work and teaching women how to trust their body-based energetic guidance for over a decade. It began, as it does for many, from the fire of tests and suffering.
Fifteen years ago, I was in a very short but very abusive marriage — I was fortunate to get out with my life. The person I was married to was arrested for coming at me to strangle me. Fortunately, we were visiting friends. It was the first time he did this when I could scream and someone would hear me and come to my aid, the first chance of a safe escape.
As I screamed, I felt the power dynamic shift marking the moment that I would no longer be a participant in my own abuse. I was safe that night and he was arrested the next day. I never saw him again.
For over a year, I stayed with friends, rent-free. I took my healing very seriously. All I knew was that I had to face what happened to me and figure out how I got into that situation. What made me susceptible to being treated so badly? I didn’t have many healing tools at the time. So I did what felt right: I stared into the darkness and tried to transmute it with my presence.
I did ceremonies on the beach and in alleys by dumpsters to purge myself of my traumatic experiences. I attempted to burn journal pages on the shore of Lake Michigan, but in the fog the damp paper wouldn’t light so I just ripped up the pages instead. It was cathartic just the same.
I began learning about and practicing healing tools and I shared them with anyone who was interested. Realizing I could cultivate the ability to receive energetic guidance changed everything, even though it’s been a long journey to really trust it. Glimpsing this whole new stream of available information made it seem like I had been walking around blindfolded before.
Ten years ago, I trained as a life coach with Martha Beck, and officially launched my healing practice serving others.
The work I do and teach — Energy Checking among other tools — has changed the patterns and perceptions that kept me in perpetual internal, and at times actual, crises. I am no longer susceptible to being manipulated in the ways I once was because I’m connected to my own center. I have developed the ability to keep myself safe. This doesn’t mean nothing bad or difficult ever happens, but it means I have access to understanding the deeper story unfolding in these situations and am aided in navigating my way through them.
I feel like I made it to shore. It is my honor to help others get there too.
And I’m still learning. I may abandon myself with old patterns and my desire to be polite, but it’s not nearly the same as it was before. Just a few weeks ago, I was talking to someone with a forced smile plastered on my face. Wow, I didn’t want to be there, but rationalizations spun in my head why I couldn’t leave.
Mercifully, it occurred to me to check-in with my body. I teach this ALL THE TIME, yet it’s so easy to forget, especially when it’s most critical. My throat was tight, chest heavy, and I was incredibly bored. I had no interest in what was being shared. I could discern no heart connection present between myself and the person talking at me. No judgment here, just factual information coming from my body. Anger rose up in response to all the times I ignored this information in similar circumstances. The anger helped me shift from listening to my thoughts about the situation which would have me stay, to my body, which allowed me to leave.
I support my clients and students in practicing listening to themselves, even when the mind, emotions, or other people get in the way. The path may be circuitous, but that’s fine. I got there. You will too.
What were some of the challenges you’ve had to overcome in offering your work to others? What advice would you give women who are just starting out?
I didn’t go into business because I love business. I went into business because I love supporting women in learning to trust their own guidance and heal from relationships that have eroded their sense of self. Developing the structure and discipline that a business requires has been a challenge, but I’m learning. In hindsight, it has become clear that each difficulty has strengthened and prepared me for my next stage of growth.
One thing that would have made it all easier was knowing and trusting Energy Checking the way I do now. That would have saved me so much effort, confusion, angst, etc.
Part of what I teach, and what I’ve been learning these last 10 years, is how to do Energy Checking step-by-step. How to really trust it and turn to it as a reliable source of information in my day-to-day life. The program I’ve created shortens that time for others so they have access to this indispensable tool within themselves as soon as possible.
Energy Checking is invaluable (I talk more about it below), especially in running your own business. I’ve really gained momentum in the last few years, as I’ve become more focused and trusting.
It is the key to navigating every other modality because it lets you know what is a fit for YOUR unique design and what is not. I can think of no better skill to master.
And here are a few other things I’ve learned for people starting their journey of creating something meaningful from their inner calling.
• Do you intend for what you are building to be your livelihood? Then I highly recommend you immediately find a non-draining side hustle to bring in the minimal amount of money to sustain yourself while you make mistakes toward your true calling. There’s something out there that is a great temporary fit for you and will take the pressure off your baby business to financially sustain you right now.
•A lot of what is challenging about moving toward your calling is not because of your shortcomings but because society is broken. We each require so much love and support, not just to be our best selves, but to be able to function in the world at all. Don’t blame yourself if it’s difficult to achieve all you see in your mind’s eye. We not only need awesome partners but vital friendships, functioning communities and just systems in society. The world is not quite there yet and that’s why it feels like you’re walking through a pool of molasses.
• Find your friends and community. I have beloved friends all over the world, and there is something particularly special about building community locally—learning how to connect to people previously regarded as strangers. It pleases me to no end when a neighbor’s fifth-grader wants to hang out; when a friend brings me a quart of freshly made soup or needs to borrow my Michelle Obama book. These friendships are my learning lab where we practice truth speaking and boundary setting because that’s what lets intimacy have a chance to grow. We connect from a place of Spirit because otherwise we’re just working with our small imperfect selves and that always gets bumpy. What I experience in these increasingly intimate and growing groups of friends grounds and connects me in an otherwise isolating world. I think we as humans, whatever we are striving for, need these kinds of supportive, nourishing connections.
• Define success for yourself. Be on your guard against what our materialistic, white supremacist culture tells you are the goals. Make sure you are putting your attention on things that will actually nourish you. Success for me is cultivating the internal freedom and clarity that allows me to engage things that are aligned with my essence. I am an artist, healer, wife (I struggle with that word, but I love my man!), Energy Checking mentor, community builder, aunt, homemaker, friend and English teacher to kids in China. It is wonderful to like my life. That feels like success. I am grateful I have gotten to the place where I am focused on flourishing and get to support the flourishing of others.
We’d love to hear more about your work and what you are currently focused on. What else should we know?
As I mentioned earlier, I teach women how to “Energy Check.” It’s all about how to tune into the body, spirit, and the Energy of the Creator to receive a physical signal in answer to a question. It uses the mechanics of muscle testing, which keeps our multi-layered minds from getting in the way of the true answer.
Here’s why it works: Your spirit, or your Higher Self, is always in the presence of the Creator and therefore always has the capacity to be guided. When you connect to that part of yourself, you are able to receive the guidance that is continually there for you. There is no question too small or too big to tap into that wisdom for guidance. Energy Checking opens up your perspective, helps dispel false beliefs, and allows you to align your thoughts and actions with the reality of your Higher Self.
Learning to receive answers through a tangible signal in your body is important because we get locked into what we already know. Even if new information comes to us, we’re very susceptible to translating it through our already formed beliefs. The body can get around this by acting as a backdoor to the mind. When I physically receive an answer that is the opposite of what my mind was expecting, my old perception melts away and my mind is able to receive a new truth.
Energy Checking is a useful tool for anyone. And I find that empaths and/or those who have experienced relationships with narcissists of any kind may find it especially helpful. That’s because it teaches you to discern what is your own truth from someone else’s projection onto you.
If you want to step more fully into the reality of your Source-driven autonomy, the best way is to tune into the answers you’ve been designed to receive from the Creator. When you develop this orientation to your own Source of Truth, you become safe to yourself. You are less susceptible to other’s ego projections or even your own ego’s well-intentioned but misdirected ideas for your life.
In addition to individual clients, my newest project — I’m so excited about it! — is launching a virtual Energy Checking Practice Circle. It’s a great place for women who are serious about developing their ability to access and trust their own inner guidance. It’s held via video conference to create time, spaciousness, and regular practice to learn how to listen and discern the ways Spirit responds and guides you at every moment. In this pay-from-the-heart circle, we share both practical how-to skills of Energy Checking as well as help participants remove any blocks that keep them from trusting their own guidance. The result, as has been true for my clients, is our own deepening trust and wisdom, within a supportive community.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.kathrynlucatelli.com
- Email: kathryn@lucatelli.org
Image Credit:
Brian Green, Kathryn Lucatelli
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